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Hello, my little ponies. Let's get the formalities out of the way, shall we? For the sake of confidence, I have vowed to never lie, even to those who may potentially look down upon me.

My name is Hain. I am a changeling.

Yes, the creatures that change shape, devour your love, and so forth. I've heard all the hatred slung my way before. I am The Enemy. It is much easier if we get that out of the way now, as opposed to you having some sort of shocked epiphany when it comes time to discuss compensation, yes?

As for why I am here, in Equestrian lands, without opposition? I am not of the Queen's hive. I severed my bonds with other changelings quite some time ago, as I felt I had a talent, something which made me uniquely superior to my bretheren.

I can help you. That is what I do, after all; I am a therapist. I will help you fix your life. With my guidance, you will be happier than you ever were before, and you will willingly surrender your love to me, as I have done you an irreplacable service. In fact, that is all I ask! I have no need for coin or service; simply provide me sustenance and I will help fix the problems within your life. That is not so difficult, is it?

I am fully aware that there are those of you who will distrust me simply due to my species. Such prejudice is quite prevalent even amongst a peaceful land such as this, of course! However, I also know that if there is anything that ponies have in a greater abundance than love, it is faith and mercy. Trust my word that I will not take anything you do not offer willingly, and I will do everything in my power to grant you happiness.

However, do be aware that my services are not free, and that I do not look kindly upon the reneging of a verbal contract. I expect the same honesty out of my clients as they expect out of me, after all! In addition, do keep in mind that in order for one to know how to fix lives, they must also know how to dismantle them.

Thank you for your time.