Plurk paste

“If woke people can identify as whatever they want to identify as, then they can identify as a person living in a world where Kamala Harris won the election, and Donald Trump lost. That is after all a possibility under the whacky made-up rules of the woke ideology.

“All you have to do is affirm with yourself every five minutes that ‘Kamala won the election’ and repeat this affirmation on a constant basis. This is what woke liberals do anyway, and this is the way they brainwash each other to believe batshit woke ideas.

“Remember that your life is one of illusion, and you are living in a fantasy socialist woke utopian mental prison where your entire existence is defined by social media, and woke political mantras. From now on, every time you hear the name Donald J. Trump, you will substitute that with Kamala Harris in your pitiful fucked up brainwashed mind. It will make you happy once again. Pretend you are at a gay parade, and gay men are walking around with their cocks and butts showing in front of young children in the streets, waving huge purple dildos in the air. Pretend that everyone you meet is a transgender person with specific pronouns.

“You are now living in a socialist woke utopia where Kamala Harris is President of the United States. Nothing anyone else says to you can change this because as a liberal progressive leftist socialist being, you are the epitome of virtue and truth, you are always correct and all other people with different views are wrong. They must be cancelled. No other viewpoint other than that of wokeness is valid or can be allowed to be expressed. Woke socialist liberals even have their own fact-checkers on the internet who invalidate and cancel anything that is not woke. This makes you as a progressive socialist liberal the arbiter of all truth in the world. Be proud of this.

“All you need to do now is congratulate yourself, and congratulate Kamala in winning the election. She really did it, the first female Indian Pajeeta President of the United States. You must celebrate immediately. Maybe get another nose ring, or how about getting a huge rod pushed through your clitoris, or head of your penis? Maybe get a Kamala tattoo across your forehead, or dye your hair a different shade of blue. It’s your choice. Kamala won the election. Yes, you can relax now. Everything is going to be all right. Deep breath, ahhhh!”